


To be myself completely

by prettybird



Category: DCU - Comicverse
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-03-18
Updated: 2011-03-18
Packaged: 2017-10-17 02:37:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/172020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prettybird/pseuds/prettybird
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She was lost, and maybe finding Jason she could find herself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To be myself completely

**Author's Note:**

> Scarlet is my favorite thing ever, basically. Her relationship with Jason has so many layers and it makes me sad to think that she may be shoved aside without any closure with him. So I wrote this. If something (grammar, characters) feel off, I am truly sorry.

Gotham is one of her scars.

She lives in other cities, and takes other names, but she knows better. She is still Scarlet and she never forgets that, just like she will never forget his voice, his eyes, and the way he made her feel safe, the only man that made sense in the madness that was her life.

Their time together was in her bones and in her flesh, and on bad days, when the pain was so terrible that she felt like dying, she thinks of Jason, and she knows that he needs her too.

 

A couple adopts her. They find her in the street, an otherwise pretty girl, if wasn't for her many scars, and they take her in like she is a lost puppy.

They are nice and caring, their faces glowing with joy at the thought of having a daughter to fill the only part of their lives that is empty.

They love her.

She thinks that if this was before, when she had another name and another face, she could love them. But now this love suffocates and burns her, a constant reminder of the the things she can not have. There is too much love for her to ever be safe in this house, with these people.

She runs away, never making a sound, never saying goodbye. She has to return to him

 

She sleeps on the streets of Gotham, wandering, trying to find him. Each corner is a memory, and each building is a place where monsters lurked, waiting for her to make a mistake.

She would not let him down. If monsters wanted to try their luck, let them come. Let the punishment fit the crime, she hears him whisper, and she allows his voice to guide her.

 

Batman (not the real Batman, the one that Jason loved. The one that smiled.) and Robin save her once – actually, not her as much as the attacker, but they do stop the man, so maybe it's the thought that counts. She expects them to realize who she is, but Batman just smirks and says “You are welcome.” very politely and disappears into the night.

However, for a moment or two, Robin stares at her, like he wanted to stare into her soul, and she thinks he knows.

He doesn't say anything though, and Scarlet has to wonder if there was a code of loyalty between children in wars, even if they were on opposite sides.

 

She is a light sleeper (you can't be anything else if you sleep in the streets), and even if he is very silent, she hears him coming closer, the sound amplified by her own nightmares.

She gets up and stands up as fast as she can, ready for any fight, because they would not hurt her. Not again.

Not until she returned to him.

“You should not be here” Robin says, the voice of an much older man coming out of a small boy.

“Neither should you” She replies. “Have you told Batman about me?”

He doesn't say anything, looking away.

“What do you want?” Scarlet asks. “Are you here to try to save me again?”

She knows how to hurt people. It's one of her best talents.

“I don't own you anything.” He says, but he doesn't really mean it. They would never be even.

“Then leave.”

He doesn't, and she can see that he is struggling with himself, trying to be the little angry boy he usually is.

“He will bring you pain. You will die because of him.” He says, giving up on his act. “You have a chance to escape. Why don't you?”

“Would you leave Batman, if you had a chance to escape?”

“I have no choice. He would be lost without me.” He replies.

“I know.”

He sighs, too tired to reply anything. He hands over a piece of paper to her, and leaves, looking tinier than ever, a miniature of himself in oversized clothes.

It was lie, what he had said about Batman being lost without him. It is a similar lie she tells herself everyday. Jason wasn't more lost because she wasn't there.

She was lost, and maybe finding Jason she could find herself.

 

Scarlet stands in front of the address that was in the note Robin had given to her. She doesn't know what expect.

It is an abandoned warehouse (he was always a fan of cliches) and she enters it with precaution, holding her breath.

Someone shoots above her head. Typical.

“This was a warning shot.” She can't believe she is hearing his voice again. It's not the voice he used for her, but the voice of the Red Hood. But it was still him “Leave now.”

She comes closer, unable to say anything, unable to resist to do anything else that wasn't simply seeing him again.

“It's me” She mumbles, awkwardly, as she walks toward the man with a gun pointed to her chest.

Her heart races and she is terrified that he won't know who she was. She is terrified that the Jason in her mind doesn't really exists anymore.

She is terrified that the Jason in her mind never really did existed.

“You will die because of him” Robin whispers in her head, but it doesn't matter anymore. If she is not Scarlet, then she doesn't know what she can be. If she can't be Scarlet, she doesn't want to be anything else.

This was worst than any pain she had ever gone through.

“You” He says, as she comes even closer to him. His eyes are wide with what seems to be fear. “You.”

He gently puts his gun down, now looking less afraid and more desperate.

“You look beautiful, Scarlet” He cries, and holds her so close and so tight, like he would never let her go. “You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. You've always been the most beautiful girl in the world to me.”

“ I know” She whispers back to him.

Jason's love doesn't hurt her in any way. It completes her, and all she wants to be very quiet, hearing the sound of his heartbeats, because he was there, and there were no monsters anymore. She could just be Scarlet now, his Scarlet.

She is safe now.


End file.
